Today was officially the half-way mark of fall semester. And I'm still alive. I think. Tell me if I'm not.

I was driving toward my parents' home today, which meant I was driving out of the range of all the best radio stations, and I came across the song, "Chain Hang Low." I liked it. I had no idea what they were saying-- "chain hang low" was a pure guess recently confirmed by Google. At different times in the song, it sounded like they were talking about jewelery, cars, or anatomy (if you know what I mean). The last was a little creepy because the song has kids singing to the tune of "Do your ears hang low?" Oddly enough, the song was on again on my way back away from my parents' home. I still liked it. Something about the chorus of black kids. But I still couldn't figure out what the hell they're talking about. So I get home, and use Google to locate the lyrics, and I still don't know what they're talking about... If they're not talking about killing men, beating women, or raping babies, it's a cool tune. From www.completealbumlyrics.com: Do yo chain hang low Do it wobble to the flo Do it shine in the light Is it platinum, Is it gold Could you throw it over ya shoulda If ya hot, to make ya cold Do your chain hang low [Jibbs] [Hook] Is that your chain!? Bout 24 inches is how low I let it hang How bout the ride n let the diamonds smoke off the range Just by the chain you can tell the big kid do his thang You know the name! Is that your chain!? Bout 24 inches is how low I let it hang How bout the ride n let the diamonds smoke off the range Just by the chain you can tell the big kid do his thang Im off the chain! [Verse 1] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Im hot kid Chains so low you would think that diamonds never stop it And it's funny cause you could never stop it A bunch of rocks on my hand n I aint even on the block yet Show em white gold sorta hold em like my tims And a chain hang 24 inches like the rims Diamonds all blown up yeah sorta like a pimp So wehn I like hit the ice It starts glistenin off the tims (off the tims) My chain hang All it do is blang blang Have blue, have red Like my diamonds gang bang And dont even think We on the same thing Charms so heavy they couldn't lift it till the crane came [Chorus] Do yo chain hang low Do it wobble to the flo Do it shine in the light Is it platinum, Is it gold Could you throw it over ya shoulda If ya hot, it make ya cold Do your chain hang low Do yo chain hang low Do it wobble to the flo Do it shine in the light Is it platinum, Is it gold Could you throw it over ya shoulda If ya hot, to make ya cold Do your chain hang low [Verse 2] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Im so icy (do yo chain) My charms so heavy that my neck dont like me (do yo chain) Go n no no no is not a game kid (do yo chain) Cause I throw my chain in the crowd (do do do do do do yo chain) Like game B Is nothing Diamonds is nothing to me (do yo chain) Especially when Im dressing up Is just a button to me Bling! (could you thro it over yo shoulda) and not to mention my teeth Cause they color coordinated Complimentin the teeth Oh bra (boy) dats! So check out my swag Diamonds red, white, n blue like the American flag Boy (do yo chain) is so colorful N see I got that nice screen My money spend on jewels I call it my ice cream (chain, chain, chain, chain) My music give you black eye Cuz of the beating They think I am a mutant The way a boy is beasting (chain, chain, chain, chain) I stay when n sometime u call it cheating Yeah, my boys always around Like is a mee-ting Is that your (do yo chain) chain!? Bout 24 inches is how low I let it hang (do yo chain) How bout the ride n let the diamonds smoke off the range (do yo chain) Just by the chain you can tell the big kid do his thang (do yo chain) You know the name! (do do do do do do yo chain) Is that your chain!? Bout 24 inches is how low I let it hang (do yo chain) How bout the ride n let the diamonds smoke off the range (do yo chain) Just by the chain you can tell the big kid do his thang (do yo chain) Im off the chain! (do do do do do do yo chain) Do your chain hang low Do it wobble to the flo Do it shine in the light Is it platinum, Is it gold Could you throw it over ya shoulda If ya hot, to make ya cold Do your chain hang low Do your chain hang low Do it wobble to the flo Do it shine in the light Is it platinum, Is it gold Could you throw it over ya shoulda If ya hot, to make ya cold Do your chain hang low

It was my youngest brother's final home (high school) football game, and since I'm now living about an hour away and wasn't feeling completely stressed, I decided to go. We get there just as the first half is ending and run into my middle brother, who is on his way to have a beer or two at the bar across the street during halftime. There are little girls in "Go Bulldogs" T-shirts everywhere, supposedly preparing to put on a "halftime show." I see someone I recognize in the stands--a girl I used to babysit. The swarm of 'tweens rushes the field, and my former charge begins to cheer: her daughter is one of the swarm. The kid is 10 or 12 years old. And I used to babysit her mother. Damn I'm old. So the swarm does a bunch of barely decipherable cheers, and then they get to one I know--only I don't know it. Back when I was in high school (in the olden days) we used to "jiggelo". Apparently, parents became concerned that students were not "jiggelo"-ing, but "gigelo"-ing, and now they "wiggelo". So the game resumes. Good guys down 6-14. No, that's not two field goals against two touchdowns. That is 3 touchdowns, 2 missed extra points and a 2 point conversion. "Friday Nght Lights" this is not. They can't throw, they can't kick field goals or extra points. There was one kid on the field that looked like he had potential, but Dad said he's 5'2" or something, which would probably hamper his chance to play on even an MIAC team. Lousy. The good guys did come back to win, thanks, in no small part, to a fumble recovery by my brother. The final score was something like 18-14: 5 touchdowns and a 2-point conversion. Wow.